Missing that oh so pregnant feeling?

Have you been cooing and awing at every baby you see and think back to the glow you had during your pregnancy? Are you wondering if it’s time to have another bundle of joy, drool, and spit up in your life? Eat three family-sized bags of Orville-Redenbocker butter popcorn in two hrs. Yes, 2.

It is remarkable how accurately this simulates a woman’s 5th month of pregnancy. You’ll break into a sweat and as your stomach churns to handling this mass of condensed saturated fat, it’ll feel as though a little elbow or foot was kicking you in the ribs.

I was sitting with some friends after shoving handful after handful into my mouth and actually had to stop and ask myself in that nano second that it takes to think anything – could I possibly be 5 months pregnant and not have known it???

In all fairness, it is possible. After all, Sienna is 7 1/2 months old and I haven’t had my period so I wouldn’t know it if I was. We’ve gone through so many stomach flues, colds, flues and just feeling wiped out this winter that a pregnancy could have gone completely unperceived.

I’ve been shoveling food – correction: crappy food – like a goose being fattened for Fois Gras.

Why? I dunno.

I always eat when I am stressed about a lot of things coming up at once. I become very preoccupied by the fear that I will forget something and so I eat. I’ve yet to understand the connection with stuffing my face and being more organized….but as I plan my week whilst typing with one hand (the other is the popcorn bowl) I find that I feel better.

Yeah, yeah.

A.

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“Cheese”

Naya has been coughing up a lung for about a week and on Thursday, her pediatrician thought that this lung might have pneumonia and sent me  and little Noosh (Naya) to get a chest X-ray.

I’m nervous about getting radiated myself, so imagine my glee when I had to shove my teeny little two year old in front of that huge machine. Now imagine me standing there remembering that I am her MOMMY and that it is my JOB not to worry her and to make everything okay.

So I did. I made it fun and she started to pose in front of the camera and as I stood covered in a led vest beside my teeny-tiny looking curly haired little girl wearing a lead apron.  We looked steadily ahead, shone a brilliant smile and yelled “CHEESE!” for the camera.

I think that there are very few rules we need to follow in order to be great parents, and one of them is not making our kids worry because they see us worry. So the next time you have to go to the doctor, ask them to listen to your heart too and get excited! Say cheese at the X-ray, try to eat the tongue depressor to make your little one laugh and make animal noises as the doctor peers into their ears search of animals or enough ingredients to make a stew.

That’s a tip from me to you, it’ll make the necessary Dr.’s calls or rigmaroles that much more fun your little love bug.

By the way, the technicians will let you see the x-ray if they see you are trying to make it all good for your little ones, and we got to see Naya beautifully clean, pneumonia-free lungs!

A.